Dear Whoever You Are,
1) Shut up - you are noisy and distracting.
2) Go on a frigging diet - knocking down that much dust? Dude lose some weight!
3) There is ABSOLUTELY NO falling through the ceiling tiles and onto my head - got that?
Guppies and Baklava,
For the Record, I am okay with rodents - but if it's a giant spider I will lose my shit.